How Can Freelance Writers Make It in This Economy?

Now is the time for creative thinking

Dear Ellie:

This recession has impacted my income as a writer so severely that I don’t know what to do. For more than 30 years, I have been successful as a freelance writer. I enjoy an excellent reputation in my city and have had continuous contracts with newspapers and a wide variety of magazines. Now newspapers are shrinking or going bankrupt, and many magazines have simply stopped publishing. I have recently been writing for some medical magazines and have experience in the restaurant and travel industries. I have not had a new contract for a number of months, and I am getting desperate. I am over age 65 and cannot survive on Social Security alone. What do you advise? Read More >>

Help Friends Stay Away from Regrets over the Past

Don't regret the things you did not do

Dear Ellie:

Recently, I have been hearing many of my older women friends talking about the things in their life that they regret. Mostly, their regrets seem to be about things that they did not do, rather than things they did do. It seems sad to me that they are thinking so negatively and missing out on the pleasures of their mature lives. What might I do to help them change their attitudes or focus their attention on the future rather than the past? Wilma

Dear Wilma:

You are very generous to want to help change your friends’ negative and remorseful attitudes. I agree with you—there is little to be gained from thinking about what we did not do in past years. However, the good thing about talking about our regrets is that we can acknowledge them, perhaps do something about them, and move on. If our regrets stay buried, they can gnaw away at our current satisfaction and cause us to live unhappily in the past. Read More >>

Writing Can Help Widow Through Difficult Period in Life

Not easy adjusting to being a widow

Dear Ellie:

My husband died recently from a heart attack, and I am trying to get accustomed to being a widow at age 68. It isn’t easy. Everywhere I look, I see his clothes, books, tools, and the things in our house that he loved. This was a second marriage for both of us. His first wife died, and I had been divorced from my first husband for many years. My late husband and I were married for 18 years and had a very successful relationship. We were interested in the same things, traveled all around the world, were active in our community, and enjoyed each others’ children. I had an ideal and secure life with him.

He left a number of letters and papers about his early life, which I have never read. He always said that I should read them after he is gone. He has been gone for six months. Do you think that I should read them now? Read More >>

Each Generation of Women Has Its Own Concerns

Cross the generational lines

Dear Ellie:

I was in a women’s group meeting recently, and I was surprised at the differences in the interests and concerns of women of different ages. I guess I never realized how much our age affects our perspectives. Do you have the same experience when you teach, make a presentation, or just go to an event with women of different ages? Debbie

Dear Debbie:

Yes, of course. Women—and men, for that matter—of different ages have lived through different historical events, and they focus on the particular issues of their own personal lives at different stages. Our age often determines what our most important issues are. The research on adult development gives us some guidelines about what to expect at different stages of our lives.

I made a presentation at a women’s group recently and started the program with a question that I often ask my audiences to address in pairs, preferably with someone they do not know. What is the most important issue in your life right now? was the question. Here are some of the answers I recorded in my notes: Read More >>

Women of the Greatest Generation Modeled the Concept of Encore Careers

Later-life careers that are meaningful

Dear Ellie:

I keep hearing the term “encore career” lately. What is an encore career, and where did that term come from? Sydney

Dear Sydney:

The term was coined by Marc Freedman, founder of Civic Ventures and author of Encore: Finding Work That Matters in the Second Half of Life (PublicAffairs, 2007). Marc also wrote Prime Time: How Baby Boomers Will Revolutionize Retirement and Transform America, in 1999, and The Kindness of Strangers: Adult Mentors, Urban Youth, and the New Voluntarism, in 1993.

I had the pleasure of hearing Marc speak a few years ago in Denver, when the Rose Community Foundation was launching its Boomers Leading Change initiative. He was very articulate and approachable. After his presentation, he sold and signed his books.  Read More >>

Should Grandma Help Finance Cell Phones for the Grandkids?

Emerging issues related to cell phones

Dear Ellie:

My grandkids are at the stage of wanting cell phones. They are ages 12, 10, and 8. It seems that, nowadays, even kids in elementary school do not use the telephone to talk to each other, but they text each other all day long. In some schools, there are inadequate rules and controls over their texting in class.

My daughter and son-in-law are asking me to help support the cost of cell phones with texting capability for their kids. They claim that they want to be able to call or text the three kids to find out where they are, when they are coming home, and if they are safe. I am worried that giving the kids these devices will just add another diversion and cost to their upkeep. What should I do? Read More >>

Is It OK to Just Say No to Social Networking?

The balance is all wrong

Dear Ellie:

I am 76 years old and use a computer every day. I like to read the online newspapers, and I get a kick out of some of the jokes people send me. I correspond with my family and friends who use computers, and especially enjoy sending interesting items to my grandchildren. But now I am being pressured to participate in what they call social networks, like Facebook, MySpace, and, recently, Twitter. I really don’t enjoy these things and don’t feel that they do anything useful for me. I am in touch with those I choose to communicate with.

Do you think that it’s OK to say “no” to these invitations? I don’t want to seem like an “old fuddy-duddy,” but I really don’t care about these new online devices. How should I respond negatively, firmly, but politely? Read More >>

Take Time When Selling Your Business

Make yourself visible

Dear Ellie:

I have had a successful business for more than 20 years. I am a manufacturer’s rep for dancewear. My territory includes four western states, and I travel to see my clients, who own dancewear retail stores, a few times a year. I have one full-time employee who knows the business well and does my bookkeeping.

The time has come for me to think about retiring from my business. I’d like more free time to travel with my husband and grandchildren. What steps should I take? Read More >>

Should I Just Be a Waitress Until This Economy Turns Around?

Dear Ellie:

I have been trying to make it in my own business for a number of years, and I was doing OK until this economic downturn happened. Now, my clients have disappeared, and I have not been successful finding new ones. Do you think I should stop trying and just get a waitressing job until this blows over? I am 56 years old, divorced, with a grown son and daughter. My health is good.

 Read More >>