The Wise and the Wary
Who can you trust? Deb hears this question over and over again in her professional practice as an elder law attorney and a fee-only, holistic financial planner. Let Deb teach you how to protect yourself and your assets from those who might not have your best interests at heart. [Editor's note: Deb no longer contributes to Silver Planet, but we have made her archived blog entries available as a service to our readers.]
Near the End, Roy Tells His Story
A life well lived
I’ll finish this month’s blog series with a story about a client I met with last year whom I’ll call Roy. Roy was 79 and diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. His decline had been rapid, with failing eyesight, increasing immobility, and encroaching early-stage dementia. His move to assisted living was imminent.
After the will signing, I sat with him for over an hour, listening to his reflections on life, the good parts and the bad. This is what he wanted me to know about him. Roy had a passion for fishing and for people. He told me about the children he met on the lakeshore and how he taught them to cast. He told me about the volunteer work he did for years at the senior center, driving elderly clients to the Arkansas River and teaching them to fly-fish. He wanted to teach me how to tie a particular fly, even with his diminished eyesight and dexterity.
Roy’s passion and largeness of heart were evident. He was sharing with me his values and his need for relationship. His clarity, intention, and follow-through defined his life. Those memories of his were events that happened years earlier, and I rather doubt he ever imagined that in August of 2008, he would be summing up his life in that way to a stranger. Those actions probably just seemed ordinary at the time, nothing momentous or noteworthy.
But that’s how it is with us. One day follows another. Actions turn into habits. Habits turn into character. Character turns into your life. If we live without clarity, intention, and action, there will be unfulfilled intentions and regrets. For us to die well, we must learn to live well. Let’s start today.
By Deborah Hoskins, JD, CFP
The Wise and the Wary Blog
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